Whew, so a lot has gone on in the last month! So on April 14th, as we were getting close to leaving for our trip I found my self in massive amounts of pain and throwing up to the point that I went in to get some IV fluids and then eventually ended up in the ER with a severe bowl obstruction. They placed a tube down my nose and I spent 3 days trying to get it to clear. Finally I was able to eat a little something and head home in time to pack and head for Florida. The night before I left for Florida I started hurting again and just tried to fight through it. Finally we landed in Florida and headed to my sisters house. I just kind of stayed away from food and tried to get through. Finally by the second day I headed to the hospital just to get checked out before we headed out on open sea. Upon arriving at the hospital they told me that I did have a partial bowel obstruction and that they weren’t sure if it was a new one starting or if it was the old one that hadn’t resolved. They said that if I wanted to stay that they would admit me and tube me again but that they would understand if I wanted to go on the trip. They said they have a great medical staff on board and worst case scenario they would medivac me off the ship. So I went and the first day I felt it kind of “break loose.”

The trip was life changing and purely amazing. We spent our days laying on the beach or by the pool and playing in the crystal clear water. Spending time with Sunnie was exactly what I needed. We just relaxed, ate, shopped got massages at sunset and enjoyed every minute. There were amazing shows and reasons to laugh every day. I can’t imagine it going any better than it did. On the last day I had another bout with bowel obstruction but thanks to the meds they called in for me I was still able to enjoy my time on the cruise and in Miami. On the flight home I began to feel a lot better and was so glad to see my girls!

I had only been home for a few days when I found myself with a giant leg after hockey and headed back to St Lukes in Boise to get it checked out. They assumed it was a blood clot and started me on lovinox shots and IV fluids ect. I got to spend mothers day in the hospital and not with my mother or daughters. They told me that I would be on blood thinners indefinitely until my cancer was gone and that if that was the case I would no longer be able to play hockey. I felt hot tears filling my eyes as I imagined loosing one of the things in my life that I truly love. Finally they did some tests and were unable to find a clot so they started looking to a Cat Scan for an answer. The only thing that they found was that the vessels in my legs look narrow and they assume that the tumors are starting to restrict the blood to my legs. Their solution of course is chemo, but I haven’t decided for sure. It has been kind of a discouraging experience.

Despite it all I try to focus on all the joy I have also experienced and the blessings I would have missed. This morning I had a new niece born and to be here to be a part of it is a great feeling. Tomorrow, I turn 30! A day I wasn’t supposed to see is almost here. I try to hold on and be excited about the possibilities the future could hold.