I am amazed at people. Today both a house keeper and a manager came up and asked how they could pray for me besides the obvious. It took all I had not to cry. The people here really are kind and genuine. I also got a hug from my friend Ann Marie who recently lost her mother in law to cancer so she definitely understands the effects. She is so sweet and recently transferred out of our department because the stress was too much for her and her relationship right now. Sometimes I think I should look into transferring too but I like my co-workers and dealing with guest but it is an exhausting experience at times. I can tell you that God puts you in situations to teach you and I can say when I travel I will be so much more patient with the staff. I have learned patience and skill both in this job. I am excited to go away for a few days this fall. We aren’t sure where yet but we are thinking maybe Vegas in the fall. A good break from life is so valuable for me. I still struggle at times with feeling like a burden at times. I hate that my being sick affects so many people. I am grateful for all the extra support though.

I think the other reason I couldn’t sleep was that I hate waiting for blood draw results. I talk to Mark today so we’ll see how it all looks. Everything is going well and I am getting orders for my bakery stuff and my no bean hummus, so fun!

I am finding myself a little frustrated right now. I am tired of being “the same” however the same is better than worse. I just want to be done with all this stuff. Mark is drawing my blood tomorrow to check some things including my CA-125. Then maybe we can make a plan before the next CT.

On the way to my Dr’s apt Tuesday I called my “chemo buddy” Marika to see how she was I hadn’t heard from her in a while and she had been on my mind a LOT. Once she answered the phone I knew exactly why she hadn’t called. I could “hear” the weakness in her voice and as we talked I learned how rough the last few weeks had actually been. She had been in the hospital on and off for the last 3 weeks and had an allergic reaction to her new chemo. Also she had gotten some devastating news that her liver was in a lot of trouble and other tumors had developed in her lungs and liver as well. Her numbers had jumped dramatically over the period of just one week. We talked about things that only cancer patients can understand and we both ended up in tears. She is an amazing woman and she has been my inspiration and strength many times over this journey! This is her second go with this disease and this was honestly the first time that I had ever seen her this down. It brought back some pretty difficult memories for me of a time when I was in that same place. We both agreed that the phone call was a “God thing” that we both needed. I know that she and I will forever be friends and had we not both been in this journey we would have never met. Mark often tells me to see the good in what has come from this and not the bad and my friendship Marika is one of the best things that has come from my getting sick. There is something special about some one who really “gets it.” I love to call her when I have good news because I know she knows how that really feels and I also know I can call her when I need to be encouraged. I encouraged her to see Dr Mark and yesterday she did. Afterwards we met up for a short visit and I was greeted with the greatest smile and hug that only Marika can give. I could tell that she had seen something new. She told me that she felt much more encouraged and that’s all I want for her. She is trying to get into a clinical trial so we are praying that her liver numbers get better and she regains some strength to continue this journey.

My daughter MeKaty decided that she wanted to do the race for the cure this year so she, Rilynn, my mom and I are all going to do it tomorrow in Boise. We are racing in Marika’s honor and it should be a great day!

Rilynn and I had another hockey game on Wednesday and she scored 3 goals! She was pretty excited. We are really enjoying it.

My friend Crystal Luna is in town. I love this girl. She is a blast to be around and an awesome friend. We have been trying to spend time together in between my shifts at the restaurant.

It’s interesting to me that now that I have hair people kind of assume that the journey is over. They expect more from you almost. I am glad to be looking and feeling better but I still visualize myself the way I used to look so when I catch a glimpse of myself in passing I am reminded that I’m not the same.