Help Crystal Fight Ovarian Cancer » Birthday

Where does time go?

Crystal Fernandez-Seid — Mon, 21 Nov 2011 16:24:01 +0000

Wow, one of my beautiful daughters is 9 years old today! 9 years? Where does the time go? It seems like only yesterday I was laying in a giant tub of water giving birth to her. It was on that day that I realized what real love felt like. This over powering desire to protect and care for someone over took me and still to this day I have those feelings. I know that I can’t protect them from the world but I will do my best to show them the right way in life despite the places I fall short. I think showing your kids that even mom falls short is important because I’ve found that people are often more impacted by your short comings and honesty that an ideal that you are perfect and untouchable. I also cherish my time with them so much. I find myself ok with my house being a little messy if I can lay on the couch and snuggle instead. Before I would clean and clean and they would play by themselves. Now I know there is always time to clean. However my house is a wreck right now as I try to get my garage in order enough that I can get my car in there before the snow gets too crazy. I have to make use of Joel before he leaves and it’s back to just me. Lots and lots of organizing left to do…

Darick and I went to our “Focus on the Children” class for our divorce. It’s mandatory in Idaho and even though it was pretty basic stuff it really seemed to impact Darick and I took some good stuff from it too. It seems like he and I are in a better place after the class and I also wrote him a letter explaining my feelings and apologizing for my part in causing our separation. I think the combination of things has impacted him in a positive way. It seems easier for him to be around me and he even came by this morning with sticky buns for Rilynn and came inside and visited a bit before taking the girls to school. It’s nice to be able to be in the same room as him and not feel like he can’t wait to escape.

We went to Lewiston for the weekend to celebrate Joel’s mom and Rilynn’s birthday which happens to be the same day. We went to lunch and the movies and Kris made Rilynn’s favorite, pumpkin pie. She got quite spoiled with sugar and treats and fun. Today we will probably do a special dinner and I am going to take pumpkin pie to school today to celebrate. Only Rilynn would rather have pumpkin pie than cake or cupcakes for her birthday at school.

It’s my last week with Joel and I am working the whole time, kind of a bummer. He is so sweet to me and the girls and we will miss having him around. He is super excited to get on the snow though and I can’t blame him there. I am actually pretty excited myself, but I keep harassing him that it’s too cold and that I like the sun better. The girls and I won’t see him for a month but then we are planning to go up there for a week at Christmas time and ski and hang out. It will be good to see him after so long. His parents were supposed to go during that time too but now his dad has to work so they may not be able to. We’ll see how it all plays out.

Well, back to work. Another day in the life of shore lodge…

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Celebrating 30!

Crystal Fernandez-Seid — Mon, 07 Mar 2011 21:54:11 +0000

Celebrating 30! So my cousin Sunnie and I have been saying for years that we wanted to do a Caribbean cruise for our 30th Birthday. Despite going through all the reasons we SHOULDN’T go Sunnie’s wonderful husband told her that time is too precious and that she should go. He said he didn’t want her not to go and regret it later. So we went on a 2 week long search for something we could afford. After hours and hours on the computer I found just the right one. We are going on a 9 night eastern Caribbean cruise leaving out of Miami for $750 per person! That’s taxes and everything. We are so excited and already have our outfits packed for the trip It will be an amazing adventure and I am so grateful to be here to see 30! I wouldn’t want to share it with anyone else either. I view life differently now and am all about making memories.

Today I turned 29!

Crystal Fernandez-Seid — Wed, 12 May 2010 00:04:49 +0000

Today I turned 29. Not only am I grateful to still be here but to have such amazing support. I had more birthday wishes than I have ever had in my whole life! It is overwhelming to know that so many people care about me and my journey. Today I sat down to write down my goals for the next few years and one of the biggest goal is to see 30 and I firmly believe that will happen now. I feel overwhelmed by all of the information that Mark has given me over the last few weeks and the weight of getting better being on my own shoulders. Mark believes that Cancer is manifested not luck, chance or genetics and the more I learn the more sense that makes. However that does not make it easier to heal from or “fix” I am doing as much as I can handle to work on the issues that cause me to manifest my cancer. I know that my health is in my own hands and can only pray and hope that I can get there. There are days when it seems like “too much” however I keep plugging along. I learned today that Thyroid stuff comes from “feeling powerless” that makes perfect sense to me because of where I am but we’ll see where that goes.

I am thankful to all of you who have donated in my honor and those who also dropped by to wish me a happy birthday.

Also on a good note, Marika’s liver enzymes have normalized since her visit to Mark and she is headed to a clinical trail interview at the end of this week. Thanks to everyone who has had her in their prayers. She is a fighter and I believe she can win this fight as well.

Whew!

Crystal Fernandez-Seid — Wed, 03 Feb 2010 03:07:38 +0000

Whew! It’s been a busy few days. I went snowboarding Friday then went out for a friends birthday, then Saturday I worked a 9hr day at the restaurant followed by a 7hr shift. It felt so good to be working and have a goal. Off we go again.